Body Love. Sadness.

I had a sad moment today. I cried. I let myself feel the loss. I didn’t run from it or smother it. And then I felt settled and was able to embrace the truth that God has something else in store for me. I intellectually knew this to be the case before today’s news. What was the news? Basically I was rejected, I offered up my talents, gifts, and service and then after months of waiting I was kindly and gently told that my best was not what they wanted. Ouch. But I really want to emphasize that this is the good kind of ouch. Feeling disappointment and rejection without needing to numb the feeling is part of living in my body. It is part of honoring my body. Also I don’t get to belittle or blame my body for these feelings… the “maybe this wouldn’t have happened if I was thinner” kind of stuff is not welcome when I am living true to myself in this physical world. Focusing on experiencing the hurt as it is and allowing it to just be what it is. This is scary and freeing. This is allowing connection, inner connection of self, deeper connection with God, and greater compassion towards others. So even with a sad and disappointing moment, or perhaps because of it, today is a wonderful day.

October 12: Today I am deeply grateful for the chance to feel without apology or deception.

Frugal Self-Care Today: Lots of water! It was another day of painting (which is really looking good), and I took care to make sure I was getting enough water breaks to keep me energized.

Want to read all the Body Love? 31 day posts; head here for a complete list.